Posted in Health, Life, Personal | 2 Comments »

I’m not quite sure how long it’s been, since i had my bout of medical madness and self-destructive fear about my heart.  I could probably look through my past posts and find out, but let’s play it all rock n’ roll instead and just guess at around six months.

In that time, I won’t pretend i haven’t had any incidents at all, where i’ve worried about something or reacted badly, but I’ve not really had anything worth mentioning.

This past week and a bit, I’ve had an incident worth mentioning.  On thursday last week (4th December) I made a rather stupid decision.  I was taking down my old bed and putting up a new one.  Rather than do the sensible thing of taking the old bed out the back and breaking it up, I decided to break it up while still in my room.  Of course, as some of you will already know, old beds contain dust, especially within the wood and fabric of the base, and also within the matress.  My asthma went wild - I was literally struggling to breathe.  Read More »

Posted in Life, Music, Personal | 5 Comments »

It would appear, completely randomly, that I’ve been getting back in touch with my love of music lately.

The reason is mainly to do with my dipping a toe in the mirky waters of newfound sounds.  And actually liking what I found, against all odds.

First - And probably most shocking of all - I decided to give the new Metallica album a spin.  Death Magnetic.  Read More »

Posted in Health, Life, Personal | No Comments »

It brings me great pleasure to announce that after however many weeks of treatement, I am finally finished at the Dentist.

Today’s little trip lasted around thirty minutes and wasn’t too bad.  Just a little bit of pain as she removed the filling she’d put there in the first place, in order to re-do it and extend it a little, to avoid a gap which was just big enough for food to squeeze into, and apply pressure to my gum.  But it’s all done now, and I would almost go as far to say I’m happy. 

Of course, the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.  Tomorrow morning i have to attend the Royal Victoria Hospital for my pre-assessment appointment, with a Sister.  Where, no doubt i’ll be exposed to things like blood pressure tests, and questioned about illnesses and medication, to find out if I’m going to die as a result of the anaesthetic i’ll recieve in my operation (Which hopefully won’t be until after Christmas!).

But, for now, things are half decent.  Hurrah! 

Posted in Entertainment, Health, Life, Philosophy, Television | 4 Comments »

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been going through a bit of a — Actually i’m not sure what it is.  I’ve not been depressed, or even sad, just spending too much time thinking about things and prone to see the negative.

So to combat this, I’ve been watching a lot of comedy.  Chicken soup for the soul.

My comedic tastes are quite brutal.  I do like a lot of innocent comedians and their acts: like Ken Dodd, Ronnie Corbett, etc, but i’m really at home with the most disgusting and brutal comedians.  Read More »

Posted in Life, Paranormal, Personal | No Comments »

As i’ve started to write again, and think about things that are going on around me, as well as looking for subjects and personal experiences to write about, i’ve realised something that was quite unexpected.

The one big motto of most writers seems to be, universally, “Write about the things you know.”  Obviously the more interesting, unique and/or experience filled lives that people lead, the more they have to write about.

• The assumption

I never really see myself as grown up, or experienced or having led a fulfilling life.  Part of the reason for that is because of my ex, who certainly liked to portray an image of me that was immature, wasn’t experienced enough in life to understand some of how it worked (A nice little psychological trick to justify wrongs and make it sound like the normal way of life).  Read More »

Posted in Life, Personal, Philosophy | No Comments »

When i went to my class last night, I was already planning to push myself a little bit.  I wanted to try and experiment with eye contact.  I didn’t really know how, or when i’d go about it, or even who with, but i just knew i wanted to challenge it.

• Taking the bull by the horns and holding on tight!

As mentioned in my last post, i had a reasonably prolonged conversation with the girl sat at the desk behind me.  This girl, probably in her mid-20s, is quite friendly, uses a lot of eye contact and is generally quite expressive.  Read More »

Posted in Life, Personal, Philosophy | 2 Comments »

I was reminded last night, of a pattern that i’ve followed since as far back as I can remember.

I think in life, for me at least, it’s easy to just do things, be certain ways and follow certain patterns without even noticing.  Sometimes you may make a mental note, but never really pay attention to it again or forget it all together.

• Fear the group

I know i’ve never been good in group situations.  Put me in a room with more than 5 or 6 people I don’t know, and you’re pretty much guarenteed an anti-social oik who will probably choose to listen to music in his headphones, rather than make conversation or get to know people.  Read More »

Posted in Health, Life, Personal | 2 Comments »

On Sunday morning, while my Dad was sleeping, my Mum noticed his breathing was dodgy.  She woke him up and discovered that not only was his breathing alternating between laboured and rapid, but he was building up a temperature too, his face was getting quite red.

We decided it was best to not take any chances and get him to the Hospital, after all, if it was just the beginnings of a cold, or Flu (He’d not long had the Flu jab), the worst they’d do is send him back home. Read More »

Posted in Life, Personal, Philosophy | 4 Comments »

In my night class last night, I had socializing thrust upon me.   “For fun,” apparently.

We were split into groups, and had to discuss “Persuasive topics.”  It worked out as quite a good thing, as it pretty much confirmed that my inability to socialize is more about a lack of practise and effort, than it is about shyness or lack of confidence.

I probably ended up being one of the main speakers of our group, or at least thereabouts.  But, i did notice something and it made me think, and you know the rules by now, if something makes me think, it’ll likely end up here in a nice, long ramble.  Read More »

Posted in Life, Philosophy | 2 Comments »

I’ve known for pretty much all of my life that i lack ambition.  Sometimes it’s played on my mind, momentarily, most of the time i just see it as part of who i am.

Last night, while in my night-class, i was talking to the teacher, in the break, and he asked what my plans were.  He wanted to know where i was planning on taking English, writing, etc, once i’d passed this course.

I had to think.  Read More »